You're not for everyone
And you shouldn't try to be.
Hello! Sorry it’s been a while. You might have noticed I’ve made a few changes around here. The name of this publication has changed from Writer Mindset to Mind Trip. The content is going to stay the same, but I wanted to update the look of things to better reflect my style and better encompass the things I want to write about. There might be more changes down the road (what can I say, I’m always evolving), but what won’t is my interest in sharing all of the mindset challenges that come with being a writer. Thanks again for reading!
Earlier this year, I decided to turn on a Substack notification that lets you see when someone unsubscribes. I did it because I thought it would be helpful. Maybe it would give me insights into who wasn’t resonating with my content or I could note if certain posts got more unsubscribes. Well, let’s just say it wasn’t. Every time a notification came through, I started to second guess my Substack and wondered if I should keep writing here at all. [Insert cry emoji.]
Well, I’m still here and yes, I’ve turned off that alert because after some reflection, I decided it doesn’t matter. Why someone unsubscribes to my content is not for me to know. I could be writing the most well-researched posts and interviewing the most interesting people, and someone unsubscribes because I made a spelling error or recommended a book they hated. Or maybe they’re straight up not enjoying what I’m writing!
If you’re putting art out into the world, it won’t be for everyone. Nothing is universally loved.
If you’re putting art out into the world, it won’t be for everyone. Nothing is universally loved. Pulitzer prize winning novels. Academy award winning movies. Books with thousands of glorious five-star reviews that sit on the NY Times bestsellers list. Revered works are guaranteed to have haters. That’s just how taste works.
I recently DNF’d a book that’s hugely popular right now. It’s on all of the lists and I saw last month that it’s going to be made into a movie. But that book moved many people. Someone on my social media feed said it made her cry!
Our desire to be likeable often overrides our desire to share authentically or create work that might not resonate with the masses. I’m thinking about this a lot as I work on a new manuscript with a morally questionable protagonist. I’m not interested in creating a character who everyone loves. In fact, I’m not even thinking about the reader at all. I don’t care if the reader likes my work. The most important person that needs to like my work is me.
This information should be freeing for you. If you already know that not everyone is going to love you, then you should go ahead and create something that interests you. You shouldn’t be creating for an audience, but for yourself and through your singular, specific lens. That’s what makes your perspective interesting in the first place. Diluting it to appeal to a wide range of people doesn’t serve anyone and you will inadvertently end up appealing to no one.
So be your weird, cringe, random self with your specific references, tastes, and opinions. The more you, you put out there, the more people will connect. And yes, you’ll lose people along the way, but don’t worry, you’ll also find more of your people too.
What I’m reading: I whipped through Yesteryear by Caro Claire Burke last week. ICYMI this novel follows Natalie, a trad wife influencer with millions of followers who wakes up one day to find herself in 1855 and she must find a way to adapt to her new circumstances. It adeptly examines what it means to live online and sell a certain idea of motherhood and womanhood to other women.
Next up for me is Bad Company: Private Equity and the Death of the American Dream by Megan Greenwell. I’m reading it for research purposes and I’ve gasped out loud at least three times and I’ve only finished the introduction chapter. Long story short is that private equity ruins everything.
What I’m listening to: I’ve been enjoying Olivia Rodrigo’s new single, “drop dead,” and have you seen the music video which was shot in Versailles? Apparently it’s the first time ever a music video has been shot inside the royal apartments, which is pretty cool. I’ve also been loving Suki Waterhouse’s new single, “Back in Love,” and will be seeing her live when she comes back to Toronto this fall for her Loveland tour (she’s great live!).
What I’m watching: I guess all of the promo Jon Hamm did for Your Friends & Neighbors got me to tune into the show. I’m almost done Season 1 and OK, I’m solidly hooked. Right now, it feels like there are too many shows and not enough time. I also have Beef 2 (Carey Mulligan and Oscar Issac!) and Margo’s Got Money Troubles (read the book first because it’s so good!) on my list. Plus, I have to get myself to the theatre to see The Devil Wear’s Prada 2, I mean, it’s feels like a must.
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